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Inside: If your 2-year-old can’t use a spoon or fork, you might be worried if that’s normal. In this article, learn when toddlers should use utensils, and what to do if they don’t use them.
When a toddler learns to use utensils for the first time, they’re so proud of themselves! They feel accomplished and they are so cute when they do.
Best Toddler Utensils For Self Feeding In 2023
But, if your toddler is having trouble using utensils, or if they are flat-out refusing to use them, you’re probably wondering what’s normal and what’s not? When
Even before they have a pincer grasp, babies can grasp a spoon or fork in their hand. They may not have very good aim though, so a spoon is the best utensil for a baby!
As your baby becomes a toddler, they can continue to use spoons and even forks. Many toddlers want to use utensils like the ones they see adults using.
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Make sure to let your toddler use utensils, even if it is messy. Using a utensil is an important developmental skill that your toddler needs. Plus, getting messy is good for your toddler and can prevent picky eating from getting worse.
Some toddlers follow a different developmental path. Working with your child’s healthcare providers can help you know what to expect for your toddler.
The age that a child will use utensils varies. Developmentally, here are some milestones as quoted by the Centers for Disease Control (2):
How Do I Get My Toddler Using Cutlery
If your toddler prefers to use their hands, that is okay! Children often continue to use their hands to eat for many years. Adults use their hands to eat foods as well.
When your toddler uses their hands to eat, it helps their body learn more about foods. This can help them learn to eat more foods and can prevent picky eating from getting worse.
If you have a picky eater, we have a free picky eater guide that can help you get your child on the road to eating more foods.
Tips For Encouraging Silverware Use
There are many utensils that are good for toddlers. If you start giving your baby a spoon, there is a good chance that as your baby becomes a toddler, they will continue to use that spoon and others.
As your child gets older, they will be able to use different types of spoons and forks. They will probably feel very grown up and proud of themselves as they begin to use different utensils.
Check out our blog for a complete list of the best utensils for toddlers and kids. You’ll find some fun recommendations from our RD and OT that will help get your toddler engaged in their food.
The Low Down On Kids & Utensil Use
Utensils can actually help toddlers try new foods. When they get a utensil, they will want to use it! You can provide new foods and foods they are learning to like. They will be more likely to try it.
For more practical strategies to get your child to try new foods, check out our picky eating course BetterBites®. Learn how to reduce your mealtime struggles and reverse picky eating in your kids.
Utensils can be a great tool for kids who might be sensitive to different textures, and a great option to help them build confidence and experience with new foods and textures.
How Parents Can Help Children To Use Cutlery Correctly And Sort Out Table Manners
For example, in the instance when a child doesn’t like touching certain “squishy” foods, using a utensil can help them feel comfortable when engaging with squishy foods without being nervous the food will touch their hands.
Jennifer Anderson is a registered dietitian and has a masters of science in public health from Johns Hopkins School of Public Health. In 2019, she founded Kids Eat in Color®, a public health resource that improves child and family nutrition and mental health. Prior to starting Kids Eat in Color® she coordinated youth nutrition programs at a food bank, performed research in inner-city food deserts, and consulted for the USDA national office SNAP-Ed program. Her academic background is in public health nutrition, cultural anthropology, and economics.Get our step-by-step plan for safely and gradually transitioning your baby from Purees to Finger Foods at your — and your baby’s — own pace
So you want to raise a civilized baby with table manners to use utensils? ? Perfect! I’m here to help. Let’s dive right in.
How To Support Utensil Use For Independent Self Feeding
Please note: This post is not sponsored or influenced by any baby companies or brands whatsoever. The recommendations I make are purely brands I enjoy and have had experience trying out. There are some links to products where I do get a small commission from Amazon should you decide to purchase them through there. This helps pay for my services to you.
There’s no official recommendation, but I personally recommend to start offering utensils right from the first meal. There really is no such thing as too soon! Even though they won’t know how to use it that early, if it starts showing up at mealtime right at the beginning of their starting solids journey, it allows them to make the association that utensils and food go together quite easily! It will also give them more exposure to utensils early on and more opportunities to practice…which we know will lead to a greater and sooner likelihood of success.
Now, if you don’t do this, I can assure you…you are not behind, nor have you ruined your child’s opportunity to learn how to use utensils.
When Should A Child Use Silverware?
So if you’re not feeling like tackling this skill…then by all means don’t rush! But as with all things feeding and development, since it’s a skill…skills take practice. And I personally like to exercise any skill early on and often so it becomes really fine tuned and both baby and parent can reap the benefits sooner. Utensil use allows for more options when eating meals, it fosters more independence, and potentially lets you enjoy generally less messy meals!
Like any skill, when a child masters it will be different for each and every one. But many parents and websites believe that healthy, term children aren’t capable of mastering utensil use until 14-24 months – which sooo isn’t true! While it’s very reasonable that some kids may very well take longer to master it (and that’s a-ok!), it’s usually just because they haven’t had enough opportunity to practice.
For example, if a baby or toddler has been spoon fed their entire life, or perhaps have only had minimal experience self-feeding, they may not have mastered the skill of accurately bringing food, or a utensil, to their little mouths with precision. For a baby who’s been self-feeding from the start, they may have better coordination and fine motor skills developed through more practice, and so this action may not be as hard for them. It all really depends on the amount of practice and encouragement they get. I’ve seen babies as young as 7 ½ or 8 months independently use a spoon, and babies as young as 5 ½ or 6 months independently use a “pre-spoon” (more on that down below). Mess will always be a factor! Independent use doesn’t mean impeccable table manners fit for fine dining. They’re littles after all!
Toddler Refusing To Eat? Here's What To Do
Good question! Babies generally master spoons first, if they’re the ones loading the utensil themselves. That’s because it takes a lot more precision to accurately spear food with a fork than it does to dip into food with a spoon. That being said, if utensils are being introduced to your child for the first time during toddlerhood, then I’ve seen both forks and spoons mastered at around equal times. It’s really different for every baby, and depends on how big food pieces are, the type of utensil they’re practicing with, and again…how often they get the practice.
The best place to start is by modelling utensil use. Even if your baby hasn’t officially started solids yet, you can pull their highchair up to the table with you at mealtime and let them watch you use your utensil to scoop and prick food, and bring it up to your mouth to eat. Give them a utensil to play with, wave around, and mouth. Encourage them when they bring it up to their mouth so they know that they’re on the right track!
Here’s a little tip…if you’re having a hard time getting your baby to let go of the spoon so you can preload the next one, have a second spoon handy that you can preload quickly after the first and offer it to your baby. They’ll likely let go of the first spoon to grab the second spoon. If they just grab it with their other hand, then haul out a third spoon and circulate between preloaded spoons, so that each time you offer your baby a new one, they’re forced to let go of one before grabbing the next.
Buying Guide 2022: Toddler Cups, Plates & Utensils
Check out the video below from a mom who graduated from my Baby Led Feeding online course, who’s 7 ½ month old baby is perfectly demonstrating how preloading a spoon can work! This method keeps baby in control of the
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